Missing the parade

This is baby Marty a few days after his first attempt at the play gym. He still needed the occasional rescue, but he was getting the hang of it.

I am supposed to take a bird to Pine Valley at 7 am to be part of a parade there. I can tell already that it isn't going to happen (my attendance, parade will go on). While I know in my head that I shouldn't feel bad about needing to rest...I still am quite disappointed with myself. After all, I still need to LIVE. Missing fun events has the effect of leaving me feel old and outside of life.

This is when I need gratitude the most, and it is the most difficult to find.

Here I go:
I am grateful...
I am grateful...
I am grateful for a cool breeze today. San Diego had some of the finest weather in the country this past week. For this I am indeed grateful.

I am grateful my friend is back from a seminar thing in Illinois. I missed her.

I am grateful for my printer (all-in-one). The days of running to get a Xerox copy somewhere are gone.

I am grateful for digital photography. I can take photos to my heart's content and it doesn't cost me a dime, so long as I send and store them on computer/online. Film and negatives and printing are very different these days.

I am grateful I did not overdraw my checking account this month. It was a close one.

I am grateful I have good credit.

There! I really am grateful for these things.
Am I more joyful now?
Maybe a little bit.

I am grateful to my God for unending love. I can live with pain, I can live with struggle....but I cannot live without love. Fortunately God showers me with love abundantly.

GratefulJoy

Grateful for things hoped for

This picture shows Marty's first attempt with a play gym. It took him a few more weeks before he figured it out.

A friend of mine called to ask for prayer today. I love to pray with friends over the phone. It's one of my "callings."

Picasso and Missie have six eggs in their nest box, though I'm doubtful any of them are fertile. Perhaps the newer ones could be and it just doesn't show up yet when I examine the eggs. Please say a prayer for Picasso and Missie to figure it all out. There is no evening course for birdie sex-ed at the community college.

Treasure is getting poofy, which makes me think she might lay eggs. Last year She and Berry killed their babies in the nest box (which was shocking) so they also need much prayer. In the animal kingdom there are many things that seem shocking when looking through human eyes. It could well be that Treasure and Berry knew that something wasn't right with the babies and did what they are programed to do. I pray for wisdom for myself to give them everything they need to be comfortable here and continue with healthy well nurtured babies.

I am grateful for my friend known as "Joyful" and the blessed phone conversation we had together yesterday. She is like a healing balm to my soul.

I am grateful for the exceptionally cool weather this summer. My electric bills are manageable when I don't turn on the air conditioner.

I am grateful for the hope I have in God. I am trusting God to get me through some difficult things physically, financially, and emotionally.

I am grateful that my life is not valued by my resume' but rather, my heart.

GratefulJoy

Recovering from laundry

Here is a photo of Amazon Parrots Shasta and Franchesco with their baby boy named Marty. Marty loved to hang out the nest box door and watch Mom and Dad, he thought everything was great and funny. Marty (poking out of the wooden box hole) was about 11 weeks old in this picture. Baby birds grow really fast but still need a lot of parental attention for a long time after they are fully grown. Marty was born in 2008. I want more Marty-ish baby birds.

Today I was grateful I didn't have big plans for my day. I needed to rest my back from last night's major laundry duty, takes a whole 24 hours for me to recover. I am feeling much better right now and hope that tomorrow I will be able to actually accomplish something.

Last night I found the cutest 2 minute video of a Senegal parrot doing about 20 tricks. So impressive! Now I want to teach some of my birds to do those same things. I wonder if I have the patience to do this? I wonder if my birds are up to it? I tried today to get my Meyers named Scooby-Dooby to do a somersault....he wasn't enthused.

Here is the link if you want to check out that Senegal online:
(copy and paste to address bar)
http://www.urlesque.com/2010/07/23/20-parrot-tricks-in-2-minutes/?icid=main|htmlws-main-n|dl7|link4|http%3A%2F%2Fwww.urlesque.com%2F2010%2F07%2F23%2F20-parrot-tricks-in-2-minutes%2F

I just tried copying and pasting the above http link and it took me to the right place. Hope it works for you also.

I am grateful for clean sheets.
I am grateful for smart birds.
I am grateful for new friends.
I am grateful I found a new check book ledger at home.

GratefulJoy

Quirky Blessings

Baby Marty, say "Ah"...

Tonight was a productive evening at the laundry. Now I am all tuckered out.

For a long while I looked forward to going to the laundry because I had made a friend there of an older Cuban gentleman named Ellio. Ellio was the evening custodian of the place. He didn't speak English and I didn't speak Spanish...but we managed to have fun conversations just the same.

A few months ago Ellio moved back to Cuba. I was sad that my friend would not be at the laundry any more to turn the chore into a fun visit. Sigh.

Tonight I took what seem like tons of laundry to wash. The new cleaning guy speaks English, but I don't know him, I miss Ellio.
I must have looked tired and over-heated, because "new guy" came over to me and told me that what I needed was for him to turn on the Air-conditioning. The place was full of people, but I was the one who needed the A.C.? Very thoughtful.
My wash went over hours but "new guy" didn't complain.

When I finally loaded my car with clean stuff I thanked "new guy" for letting me stay late. He wasn't put-out, so he said. And, he gave me the funniest compliment:
"Your laundry always looks the cleanest...of all the people who wash here."
What a funny thing to say!
Then he said,"Your stuff always looks like new coming out of the drier."

"I like things clean," I replied.

One benefit to being germophobic is that my laundry gets spic and span.

"New guy" gave me that silly compliment, yet it made me smile the whole drive home. I think God knew I needed a pat on the back since Ellio is gone. Little blessings come in the most unexpected places and in the most peculiar packages. A.C. for my benefit and some fellow saying my laundry looks clean. Hee hee.

I am grateful for quirky blessings.
I am grateful God understands my need for affirmation.
I am grateful for loads and loads and loads of clean laundry.

GratefulJoy

Progress

This picture shows a Painted Conure baby getting her first wing trim. I always wait until the babies are fully flighted (can fly easily) before giving their wings a trim. I feel it is important for birds to know that they are birds and be aware of their ability to fly. The new owners may choose to let the wings grow back and let their birds have full flight. Proper wing trims are like a hair cut and cause no pain or damage to the bird.

Today I am grateful that I slept soundly last night (or, earlier this morning). I am also grateful for the answered prayers for my friend's dad who is currently recovering from a middle of the night appendix surgery.

I am making slow but sure progress on cleaning and organizing my bedroom. It sort of got away from me a while back and I want to reclaim this room as my sanctuary...free of clutter or projects. I need a place that is dedicated only to rest. Now I feel that much closer to this goal, after much paper shredding and recycling and such.

Daffy bird is asking me to pick him up. He does that by saying,"step up." Now I will go have some quality time with this yellow friend. He also likes to say,"I'm yellow."

Grateful for answered prayer.
Grateful for progress in my bedroom.
Grateful for pleasant weather.
Grateful for the love of God and friends.

GratefulJoy

The glass is 1/8th full

This picture shows what my apartment looked like for about ten minutes last year...and then everything came spilling out again onto the floor and furniture. I really like clean...REALLY! For some reason cleanliness in my home is far more elusive now than it was ten years ago.

I was able to accomplish two small things on the "to do" list today. That is like the "glass 1/8th full". I am grateful for those small things anyway.

I am grateful I put up new mini-blinds in one window (and purchased them for about $4 at Home Depot).
I am grateful I took two big bags of laundry to my car for future wash.
I am grateful I had lots of snuggle time with Zoey today.
I am grateful for all-fruit ice pops.
I am grateful for the recycle bin.

GratefulJoy

Really Tired

This picture shows my brother Ted and his wife Nancy. They have been married 20 years now. Their wedding 20 years ago was just before I ran off to Hong Kong for a few years. I remember the wonderful change in their lives at the same time I was going for the adventure of my life. Was it really 20 years ago?!

I was very tired today. My plan to go to opening day at the Del Mar race track fizzled out and I was simply grateful for one good phone chat with a friend instead. I do want to see at least one horse race this year since I've never been to one.

Off to bed again for me.
I am grateful for my vacuum cleaner and spare emergency vacuum cleaner.
I am grateful for my TV when I am feeling yucky and lonely.
I am grateful for the wonderful meeting at my friend's home last night (Thrive).
I am grateful for the new friends I am getting to know through the Thrive seminar.
I am grateful for the kindness I see in others.

GratefulJoy

Slightly improved parking

Today's photo was taken last year during my train ride in Skagway, Alaska. This past weekend was so hot and sticky...I just wanted remember what it was like to see snow capped mountains and not feel hot. By the way, if you ever get to Skagway, I recommend this train trip.

Tonight I am thankful for the 5 eggs that Missie and Picasso are brooding in their nest box. I suspect another egg or two will join this clutch within the week. Eggs are laid every third day with Picta Painted Conures and then hatch in that same order if they survive.

I am also thankful for my slightly improved parking space at my apartment complex. For the first time in my 17 years here I am parking "in the back" and off of the street. This helps me feel a bit more secure when I come in later at night and need to make several trips to unload something from my car.

This new parking spot is right in front of the recycle bin. I anticipate less pile-up of papers and cans in my place since I can drop off my recyclables conveniently each time I go to my car. At least that is my plan.

I am still praying for a garage to be made available to me one of these years here.
There are nearly 20 apartment units and only 4 single garages. The woman who just took the one available garage has waited 20 years for it. There is a touch of political game-playing involved in such privileges and I am not good at that type of game. If I do get a garage it will be a BIG miracle.

I am grateful I can park in the back.
I am grateful bird food was on sale today.
I am grateful for pillows.
I am grateful for fans and A.C.
I am grateful for discount coupons.
I am grateful for my Lilac Crowned Amazon parrots.

GratefulJoy

Dealing with the heat

These photos were taken at the Cabbage Patch hospital where genuine Cabbage Patch babies are born. I saw "Mama Cabbage" and twin girls being born....
This was enjoyed during a trip I took a while back through Georgia and Tennessee.
By the way, Mama Cabbage never feels pain during deliveries....because the nurses there give her an I.V. of "imagicillin".

Today it is sweltering in my apartment. I am thankful for the A.C. window unit in my bedroom. I do worry about the birds over heating in the other room. Some friends of mine have lost many birds during heat spells. Bird folks cannot just leave home without thought to what could happen to their birds during the hours they are away...step need to be taken such as temperature control.

Today I am thankful for my bedroom and A.C. unit.
I am grateful for cold showers.
I am grateful for Popsicles.

GratefulJoy

Behind the scenes of a photo shoot

This is the more accurate account of a photo session with baby birds.
This is an addition to today's blog entry.

Tenacious and Curious

In this photo of four Painted Conure babies the birds seem to obediently sit and do exactly as I like. Folks see this and say: "Golly, you are such a great photographer." The truth of the matter is that I take A LOT of pictures...one of them is bound to look alright. I am adding another photo (see both log entries for today) so you may see what was REALLY going on with these wiggly little birds.

I am beginning to enjoy fresh papaya. A few years back I couldn't stand it, couldn't stand seeing or smelling fresh papaya. I think this is because it has a similar smell and flavor to Ipecac. When I was in my "Marriage and Family Living" class in High School they taught us about Ipecac (the stuff parents sometimes give children to induce vomiting if necessary). Being curious, I went out that evening and bought a bottle. Wanted to see if it worked. I downed the entire bottle. Tasted bad but nothing happened.

"This stuff is useless," I thought.

Then I left for my after school job as a night janitor at a bank. After the first hour and a half I started to feel a little off....it hit me just at the end of my 3 hour shift...Ipecac attack. I was very ill that night.

The lesson I learned was that not everyone responds right away (or at all) to ipecac. I couldn't stand the sight or smell of papaya or prunes ever since.

I suppose 30 years later I have gotten over the ipecac thing. I buy fresh papaya for my bird Zoey because she is accustomed to having it from her previous home. I dreaded cutting the stuff up for her.
Amazingly, I almost like fresh papaya now.
Persistence. Pays off...just like the photo sessions with baby birds.
Eventually I get the picture.

I am grateful I am naturally curious.
I am glad for my own tenacity. Without this tendency to push through
until I've "overcome" I would not have developed most of the skills I now have.
I thank God for making me Curious and Tenacious.
I also thank God for the times He rescues me when I am over-curious and over-tenacious(stories for another time).

GratefulJoy

p.s. Remember to look for the more accurate photo of the baby birds above.

I am Thriving

I took this picture a couple of years ago at friend's home during a big renovation project. The splotchy building behind the beautiful yellow flowers is an interesting juxtaposition. By the way, these trumpet shaped flowers are VERY POISONOUS!

Tonight I was at a nice meeting at my friend's house, same house as the flowers above. The point of this meeting series is to use steps from a program called "Thrive" to reprogram our brains to work as they were intended to work...had we not been traumatized, neglected, addicted to something...or any other thing that throws the brain out of whack. It's very interesting.

I look forward to jump-starting my brain. Half of my brain went on a holiday and we have not been in contact for a while. Maybe I will be more efficient and better able to cope with ordinary life better after this Thrive thing? The ultimate goal is to have a better relationship with God and also with the others in our lives.
I'm all for that.

I am grateful for the hospitality of my Joyful friend tonight.
I am grateful for the selfless act of my Joyful friend's husband giving up his television tonight, missing the All-Stars Baseball game, so that we could have our Thrive video.
I am grateful for the box of all-fruit ice pops my friend gave to me tonight (I ate a grape one on the drive home in my car).
I am grateful that all of my birds are quietly sleeping as I type this blog.

GratefulJoy

Good Fruit....of The Spirit

Here is a photo of my current Picta Painted Conure eggs (picture taken July 12, 2010). These belong to my pair named Missie and Picasso. They will most likely lay a few more eggs over the next two weeks. It will be that long before I can tell if any of them are fertile. Please say a prayer for these little eggs and the birds sitting on them.

Tonight I am reminded of the blessing on Peace Makers. At a club meeting the other night some unpleasant issues came up and tempers flared. One of the board members regularly jumped in with peaceful ideas, negotiation strategies, and the general assumption that all involved meant well. I so appreciated that peace maker during those discussions! Blessed are the peace makers.

I wish everyone who ever met me would assume the best about me. Assume I mean good and not evil, that I am truthful rather than untruthful, that I am giving rather than selfish.... Do we not all wish this for ourselves? What a different world it would be if the "Fruits of the Spirit" were the guiding force in all of our lives?

These are the "Fruits of the Spirit" from the Bible (Galatians 5:22-23):

Love
Joy
Peace
Patience
Kindness
Gentleness
Goodness
Faithfulness
Self-Control

I am grateful that my God looks at me with eyes of love, patience, goodness, and all of the rest of the good and wonderful attributes of God. I pray for the grace to see others this same way.

GratefulJoy

Is it Monday?

This picture is of a bird I used to own named Isabella. She is looking elegant in this picture. Isabella and her sweetheart Ferdinand (Philippine Blue Napes) were very beautiful but far too loud for an apartment setting. They both now live in Colorado where they can scream 'til the cows come home.

I am all tuckered out today. Though I have not dressed or brushed my teeth nor done anything else normally done on a Monday, I am grateful to God for life. I look forward to finding out what the actual purpose of my life is intended to be. One of these years God will fill me in.

I am grateful for mandarin orange slices.
Grateful for email.
Grateful for cold water.
Grateful for electricity.

GratefulJoy

Gratitude and Joy coexisting with anger?

This photo was sent to me by my friend Eve in Arizona. She took this picture of her Painted Conure eggs....18 eggs all together!!! Only 4 of them became actual birds in the end though. This is how I feel my life works too: I make a big effort and do a lot of running around, but, in the end, very little gets produced.

The past two days I have been dealing with my own anger. Anger is an emotion I do not often feel. I feel sad, disappointed, self-doubting...but rarely anger. I think when I was a child I decided that anger was an unproductive and destructive emotion and I simply decided not to let myself be angry ever since (but on rare occasion). Only in recent adult years have I allowed myself to feel angry. Anger is a two edged sword, I don't want to slash up myself or anyone else.

I have very little patience for folks who lash out in anger. I run the other direction fast when someone focuses anger my way. Perhaps this isn't so much that anger in itself is bad, it's when I've not done anything to provoke it from the other person. In my attempt to be more honest about my emotions and attitudes I am finding that I do need to acknowledge my own anger more...in a way that is not hurtful though. Keeping it hidden is like covering a dirty wound.

Didn't Jesus say: "Be angry, but do not sin."?
Therefore there must be a way to feel my feelings and not let those feelings become hurtful. I'm still exploring that idea since anger is sort of new to me.

These past two days of feeling angry have made it difficult for me to find gratitude and joy. I want my gratitude to be genuine and not just words I throw down on this blog.

Let me think....hmmmm....still thinking....what am I grateful for now?
I am grateful for my fly swatter. There is a seed moth plague in my bird room and I am swinging that swatter around like there's no tomorrow. A friend suggested I just paint my walls "seed moth grey" and be done with it.

I am grateful for bosc pears. One of the nicest fruits ever.

I am grateful for my hair (the hair on my head anyway).

I am grateful for cotton pajamas.

I am grateful for friends who call me on the phone just because they like talking to me.

I am grateful for netflix movies by mail.

I am grateful for the U.S. Postal Service.

Well, I have managed to find some things that I am really glad for.
This is great in light of the fact that I have not yet worked through all of this anger yet.

Honestly this blog helps me work things out. I've tried personal journals before but they always seemed pointless and I lost momentum after about day 3. The blog makes me accountable (even if just theory) to my readers (both of them).

GratefulJoy

Two eggs in Picasso and Missies nest box

Here is a photo of Scooby-Dooby having his shower today. Now he is munching on some apple.

My birds Missie and Picasso have two eggs in their nest box today. Whoopee!!!
My first eggs for 2010. Last year their eggs were not fertile, hopefully this year they will make actual babies. They will be very beautiful like their parents (Picta Painted Conures).

Tonight I have a bird club meeting. I am hoping I feel up to the drive. The guest speaker is a man locally known for his breeding of Pyrrhura Conures. Will be very interesting.

Sunday evening I have another bird club meeting. That meeting is a different club's 37th birthday party. I made up some games and got some prizes. An artist will also be there to show her bird art works. I feel a little overwhelmed with my job of hostess on Sunday because I have a lot to prepare for the evening.

Right now I am grateful for the hope of Picasso and Missie's babies.
Grateful for the box of beads that I ordered arriving today.
Grateful I finished the red "Garden Necklace".
Grateful for a friend who called today.
Grateful for medical insurance.

GratefulJoy

Missie and Picasso will soon have eggs

This is a picture of Treasure minding a clutch of her babies (and eggs) a couple of years ago. Last year I didn't get any live babies from Treasure and Berry. Not a good year for baby birds in 2009. However, my Painted Conure pair named Missie and Picasso are going to lay (my) first eggs of the year any time now. Last year they laid many eggs but they were all blanks. Hopefully they've had enough practice to get it right this year.


I am grateful for the soon to arrive Painted Conure eggs.
I am grateful for clean hair.
I am grateful I had enough quarters to do two loads of laundry yesterday.

GratefulJoy

Thankful for clean laundry

I suppose I need to take some new photos. I'm running out of fresh pictures... posting bits of things I've already shared. Hence, another detail from the "Garden Necklace."

My daytime today was slow slow slow. The evening perked up though and I went to the laundry! Hurray!!!

I took out some trash and recycle, I did two large loads of laundry, and I went to the market and bought fruit. That is more productivity than I've had in a long time. I am thankful for clean clothes, fresh fruit, milk, and less trash in the house.

I am also thankful for a phone call from my friend in Tennessee.

GratefulJoy

A "Good Day"

This is another photo of my Garden Necklace (small detail) which I hope to complete before the end of this decade.

Anyway, I have been spending far too much time in isolation these days. I need to be more social. That takes physical and mental stamina....of which I have almost none. Another issue to take up with God. The good news here is that God is capable when I am incapable. God also helps me in ways that are beyond my own skills, strength, or whatever. I look to God.

Today I have fewer dirty dishes in my kitchen than I had yesterday. And, I washed off the top of my stove. Those are pathetically small tasks. My definition right now of a "good day" is when I make any progress of any sort on my back-log of chores and tasks and projects. Therefore, it was a good day.

I am grateful that the garden necklace is almost finished.
I am grateful I can use half of my kitchen sink.
I am grateful for dried fruit.
I am grateful for my camera.

GratefulJoy

My first Garden Necklace

I took this picture today of a "garden necklace" that I've been working on. It isn't finished yet...almost. I've seen garden necklaces of different sorts before and always wanted to make one. This bead stuff takes forever to make and is deceptively expensive to make....though I am compelled to bead. One day I hope it will pay off.

Right now I am grateful for my fingers and my eyes. Without these I would not be able to make the things I love to make.
I am grateful too for my vacuum cleaner.

GratefulJoy

The benefits of driving a clunker

This photo shows Daffy bird enjoying the attention of some of my neighbors in our apartment courtyard. Daffy is the most social bird I have ever seen. He is very good about meeting new folks and tolerates many things even if he doesn't like them. I have learned a thing or two from this yellow bird.

This evening while in a parking lot I saw a stray shopping cart careen down a slope and into the side of another parked car. If I'd have been able, I would have stopped this...I was out of reach. Though it wasn't my car getting rammed, I held my breath as I watched. It's the empathetic instinct (in all of us) that caused me to panic for the other vehicle even though I have nothing invested in it. The good news is that the cart did no visible damage and I went on breathing.

As I drove out of the parking lot and onto the street a myriad of benefits (to my 1994 Mazda Protege") ran through my head. For instance, if that shopping cart had been rolling into MY car I wouldn't have much cared. There is the fact that nobody wants to steal a 17 year old economy car. Also, everyone assumes there is nothing of value inside such a car and would not bother to break in.

The financial benefits are there too. My insurance is inexpensive.
And my annual registration is less than $100.

I also feel the old car is good for my soul. It forces me to be humble. Honestly, one does not puff up with pride when entering or exiting this car. I am reminded that the car should get me from here to there...not elevate my social status.

I confess that I would like to have a new car, a bigger car, a prettier car, a car with working A.C. However, I must also thank God that this particular car was a gift from heaven. It still gets reasonably good gas mileage, and it is fairly reliable.
I choose gratitude for my car over frustration with it's flaws.
I am now giving myself a mental pat on the back for this choice.

I also choose to be grateful that I delivered a good check to pay my July rent. It was on time (as always) and I know that I am securely housed for another month. It would be easy for me to focus on the minimal progress of today as a whole, or become agitated with my neighborhood, or some of my neighbors' mannerisms, or the worn and ugly carpet in my flat....I choose to be thankful for my home. I am thankful I am allowed to keep my birds here even though there is a "no pets" policy. I am thankful I do not need to have a roommate at this point in life (have had quite a few in years past, not always easy). I am also glad for my spacious living room.

I can go from sad to glad in a cool minute. I need to choose my focus and dwell on that which is good and lovely and peaceable. The "fruits of the Spirit" come to mind.

I suppose this blog thingy is working because I feel much better now than I did only minutes ago!

GratefulJoy